her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
