I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
