Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
