This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
