; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
