Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I don't think brook has ever known best
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
