I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
