Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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