Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Randomize
