I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize