I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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