Having a random hookup so left but love u
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
