I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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