Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
My feet surprised me
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