yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Randomize
