I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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