so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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