Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
