So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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