Define "chronic" masturbator.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize