That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
