worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Randomize