It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
