i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
pop tarts are not kleenex
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
