i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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