Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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