Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Randomize
