Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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