idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
