Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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