Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I don't deserve a penis
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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