I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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