He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
