i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
