This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
