What tipped you off? The sombrero?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
he was CRYING into my vagina
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Randomize
