he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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