Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Randomize
