Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
