I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
