Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
