In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
