i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize