Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Who put my cat in the fridge?
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
