i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize