I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
