i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
