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• (314): View more from Missouri

  Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?

  (573): View more from Missouri

  I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?

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• (347): View more from New York

  you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Found more tequila

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia

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• (940): View more from Texas

  My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!

  (940): View more from Texas

  HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.

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• (760): View more from California

  Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."

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• (315): View more from New York

  Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.

  (1-602): View more from Arizona

  Awwwwwww!

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Better not shit yourself at the gym.

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• (469): View more from Texas

  I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.

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