dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize