You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
