Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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